Archives: Bitchslapped by Batman! – The Bean (Sat) 1/26

Date: Wednesday January 16, 2019

Time: 12:00






With a forecast of 12° and -115 plus wind chill for Saturday January 26, the people of Chicago prepping to self cocoon for the weekend want to know…

Will tomorrow prove that tough times don’t last but tough men do?

Whose nose hairs will freeze the quickest and hardest?

Will the men of F3 Chicago go Chippendale because they can?

Tune in tomorrow, same bat time, same bat place!



Who was it that questioned the victor in a contest between nature and man (cough: Ladybug)? It is true that the PAX who posted on the morning of January 26 (Denari, Ladybug and Homer taking the Q) were tortured by the obscene cold that bit into them, à la gila monster, and wouldn’t let go into until they fled to cavernous parking garages of Millennial Park. But after a quick recovery and quiet gratitude that no fingers turned black and would have to be amputated, the PAX earned high praise for their performance from the trolls that live in the parking garages.

1.   60 Second Soapbox

2.   Side Straddle Hop Relay – 100

3.   Synchronized Mosey

4.   Patty Cake Merkin – 20

5.   Mosey (read: retreat) to the parking garages

6.   Partner circuit: 50 burpees, 100 lunges, 150 merkins, 200 squats

7.   Abe Vigodas/Reverse – 16

8.   Seal Clap/Overhead – 16

9.   Old Faithful – till fail

10. Meat Wagon

11. Little Faithful – till fail (New!)

12. Super Os – 20

13. Flutter Kicks – 16

14. Freddy Mercury – 16

15. Peter Parker – 16

Due to imperfect execution, the January 26 60 Second Soapbox, and the accompanying beatdown, will make a return in the future. Whenever there’s a choice between four words, go with “I got your six” instead of “oh, woe is me.”



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